I can understand why Weight Watchers decided to put a bemused-looking avatar next to the message that you’ve gained weight since the last time you plugged your digits into the site. (Last time I plugged my digits into the site was about a month ago, and I’ve been going up and down since then.) I mean, sure, you can’t show a picture of a ham, or a cartoon plate of turkey bones, right? A bemused avatar seems like a good choice.

Why, in god’s name, they had to give that avatar a puffy 3D effect — to make it look like five pounds of smiley-face avatar in a two-pound bag — I can’t understand. “Oh dear lord, fatty! Your inability to stay away from delicious strawberry rhubarb pie is bending the very fabric of the universe, and as a result, EVEN THE VERY ELECTRONS USED TO MAKE THIS AVATAR are becoming overweight! Stop, before your love of butter changes the coefficient of the electroweak force and destroys us all!”

Anyhow, the news isn’t all bad — I’ve been exercising a fair amount, and when I do that, I don’t watch what I eat as carefully. Lydia’s starting to see the jog stroller as a regular feature. She spreads a towel on her lap like she’s the czarina out for a sleigh ride, and waves to the squirrels.

And asks questions:
“What are you doing, daddy?”
“I’m… “[pant, gasp] “pushing you, “[pant, gasp] “baby!”
“oh.” [pause] “Is it hard?”