We go from the ground to the mountain, baby! Without walking!

Lydia gets cranky around dinnertime. Not cranky, precisely, just agitated. Doctor Sears and Google both told us to expect this, so it’s not a huge shock, but it is tiring. She used to get calmed down instantly by sucking on my pinky finger, but she’s figured that one out now, and only needs a quick moment to determine that she’s not really interested in my hand. And it’s not a hunger thing; her impression of a baby alligator when she’s hungry is clear and unmistakable. Well, it’s more like a cross between an alligator and a young, diesel-powered wood chipper.

I usually go into discovery mode, trying all the holds advertised in the baby manuals. Each time, Lydia looks at me reflectively, considering the advantages, and then dissolves into tears. Football hold, count to twenty? No dice. Colic hold, count to twenty? Nope. Side-lying hold, count to tw- Oh, hell no, we can rule that one out right away.

It was Kate that discovered what seems to be the magical solution right now:
Thermonuclear Orchestral Marches.


Kate remembered a version of Funiculi, Funicula (link goes to iTMS sample) that her brother listened to as a child, so I plunked down 0.99 for it. I accidentally didn’t get the singalong version, though, but something from the CD “Italy: The Pride and the Passion”, in which the musicians seem to be getting paid by the decibel. Or the conductor was stone deaf. And Lydia loves it. We’ll hold her and dance around crazily, shaking the china in the cabinet, and she drifts off blissfully and peacefully to sleep.

This is a lot of fun, and I’ve been learning the original Italian lyrics so I can bellow along with the stereo. But we’re getting a little tired of the song over and over again. The “Pride and Passion” CD yielded only one other good up-tempo orchestral barn-burner (good for wearing a fake handlebar mustache while holding the baby), but I’m coming up short on other, similar songs.

Here’s what I have so far:

• Les Toreadores, from Carmen
  
• A somewhat anemic Battle Hymn of the Republic
  
• Darth Vader’s Imperial March, a personal favorite.
  

…and that’s about it. Help! I need more eyebrow-singing orchestral music! Sousa marches would have been great, I thought, but they end up being somewhat sedate. I need fist-pounding, smoking-crack-in-the-earth music! Any suggestions? Click the “Comments” link below!