The 2002 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest Winners have been announced,

recognizing the most wretched writing on the Web (or anywhere else, for that matter.) A sample:

“The bone-chilling scream split the warm summer night in two, the first half being before the scream when it was fairly balmy and calm and pleasant for those who hadn’t heard the scream at all, but not calm or balmy or even very nice for those who did hear the scream, discounting the little period of time during the actual scream itself when your ears might have been hearing it but your brain wasn’t reacting yet to let you know.”

–Patricia E. Presutti, Lewiston, New York (1986 Winner)

If you think you can take it, you can see other Lytton Grand Prize winners here.